Monday, May 9, 2011

4 months in.. 1st deployment funk.

I like to think I've done pretty well during this deployment. I've stayed positive and upbeat. I've kept up with all my housework and laundry and have done lil projects here and there. I haven't just laid and felt sorry for myself. I've kept busy with Ladybug Creations and with Ladybug herself. I've taken on dual roles of mama and papa and have done it fairly well. I've done things that I've never done before.

I get annoyed when I see a spouse, who has a deployed husband, who CONSTANTLY complains about how hard life is without her husband and how they can't keep up with anything. That was never an issue for me because when Kevin was here I NEVER did housework or laundry when he was home; well, some laundry on the weekends, but I made sure all of my housework duties were done during the day because I don't want to spend the little time that I do get to see my husband cleaning. I can't stand the "woe is me" wife who can't cope with a deployment. Yeah, it's hard. I get that. I'm there now so don't say that I don't understand because trust me, I do. But our husbands aren't the only ones that signed up for this, we did too.

So now it's my turn. I'm taking my first stab at the deployment complaining. We're almost at the finish line so you would think I'd be super duper excited, which don't get me wrong, I am beyond excited to see my husband to be a family again. As most of you know, yesterday was my birthday. It didn't feel any different because I did absolutely nothing special for my birthday and Rosalie isn't old enough to comprehend it lol. Well I was in a funk. At first I thought it was because I was being the mopey-military-wife that was sad because her husband wasn't there for her birthday. Then it hit me that it wasn't that at all. Kevin and I have spent A LOT of holidays apart. Rosalie has only slept one night since we've been home. We've been home 2 weeks and in those 2 weeks, I got sleep ONE night and have been busting my butt trying to get this place back to normal and ready for Kevin to come home. That was it. My sleep deprivation had finally caught up with me and it really had my emotions out of whack. I'm just absolutely ready to have my husband home to catch maybe a TINY TINY break!

If there was anyone that I was short, distant, or snippy at yesterday... I apologize and don't take it personally.. I was just having a bad day. Hey, we're all allowed one of those every now and then aren't we?

We still lacked sleep again last night.. but I have to get things done. I have a TON of bow orders to fill and I'm starting the spring cleaning process in my house. I cleaned for a week straight when I got back just to get this place back to normal. Now comes the process of deep cleaning.. scrubbing, dusting, and washing everything.

As I said before, we've been spending a ton of time outside.. so here's a few pics :)


  1. Hey if you need any help, call the CDC and send her that way for a few hours then maybe you can catch some sleep or have a friend watch her (if you feel comfortable enough to do that.)

    I was waiting to see if your sleep was going to catch up with you, because in time it does.

  2. Sleep's been an ongoing battle with us. Rosalie started sleeping through the night shortly after coming home from the hospital.. then when she was 4 months old we went to the states and with the time change and she started teething at the same time, it took a toll on her sleeping. She sleeps like a newborn and will get up every 3 hours. Sometimes I can do the whole cry it out; but unfortunately a lot of times she'll get herself worked up and throw up. I'm starting to get use to the no sleep thing, but some days I just turn into an emotional train wreck. I'm super weird about leaving her with anyone. I just tough it out and on weekends her dad will get up with her when she gets up for the day so I can get a few more hours.. so I just keep telling myself he'll be home soon and I"ll get that little break lol. Thanks for the advice though!

  3. Just so you know, with Kevin being gone I'd have to say from my viewpoint, you have done wonderful! I hope I can be as great as you have been when Nick deploys next year! Go you!

  4. Thank you! I have tried my hardest to stay upbeat and positive and i didn't struggle with it until the last week! lol